Life Is an Audition: Recent Books About Young Adult Performers (from Huffington Post Books)

This article originally appeared on The Huffington Post Books. "My life has been one big audition."

This is the first line of Elizabeth Eulberg's latest young adult novel, Take a Bow [Scholastic, April 1, 2012]. Take a Bow follows four young performers--two songwriters, one singer, and an actor--through their senior year at the fictional New York City High School of the Creative and Performing Arts (seemingly modeled off of Manhattan's Fame high school, the Fiorello H. La Guardia High School of Music and the Arts) as they strive, perform, and chart their futures. The book reads quickly and it will appeal to various young readers thanks to its range of characters, romantic storylines, and behind-the-scenes look at what is required of talented teens (though some may find the intermittent insertion of flashbacks and backstory confusing).

While we readers may feel exhilarated by the success and talent of the story's stars, it's clear that they are quite exhausted by their daily lives. Female songwriter, Emme, declares herself to be "tired of the auditions we have to do to be accepted each semester, tired of the extra classes and studios, tired of the concerts, the pressure, the competition. The constant competition." On top of regular auditions there are also pre-auditions for the most prestigious college music programs, like Julliard. These kids never get a break.

Television shows, like Glee, make it seem like musical numbers--complete with choreography and costumes--are simple to throw together. But teens spend hours honing their creative crafts whether they are singing and acting, like the characters in Take a Bow, or dancing and film-making, like the characters in Carol Tanzman's latest dancergirl.

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dancergirl features high school student Alicia, a contemporary dancer who works at her dance studio to help afford extra dance and choreography classes. While she hopes to become a professional dancer, fame comes to her sooner than she expected when a classmate features her and her dancing in a series of short docu-style movies that he posts to online website Zube (a fictional version of YouTube). Suddenly strangers recognize Alicia and think they know her. And one person starts stalking her (though the careful reader will figure out who the stalker is before the big reveal it doesn't take away from the suspense of the story). The unwanted attention, including anonymous online comments, impacts Alicia's dancing, sense of self, and her physical safety.

Like Alicia many young girls today are constantly performing for others, even if they aren't dancers. Recently t(w)een girls have used YouTube to ask strangers if they are pretty or not. Technological innovations like YouTube and Facebook mean that kids today are constantly performing for others--and there will be a record of their achievements and failures, good deeds and misdeeds.

Clearly it's not just high school students who feel the pressure of the constant audition and performance of daily life. Children's literature reflects pressures for the elementary school-set as well. As an indication of how ubiquitous competitive activities are in young girls' lives, American Girl's "Girl of the Year" for 2012 is McKenna.

McKenna is a fourth-grader hoping to make the competitive gymnastics team. The first two books in the series, McKenna and McKenna, Ready to Fly!, detail her struggling to balance school, friends, and gymnastics as she deals with injuries and competition. The books reveal that one has to receive a letter to be invited to qualify for the "preteam," that certain elements are required in each routine to even be considered for that preteam, and that placing in the top two at a competition is what it takes to actually make the team.

Overall these four young adult/children's books reflect what is going on in many kids' lives today. The constant competition and evaluation--both by peers and by judging adults--are accepted by youth. While some parents fight against demanding, competitive activities and stressful schoolwork, (for example, documentaries like Race to Nowhere), others seem to accept that this is what is required if they want to help their children achieve and get into college. A whole afterschool industry exists around competitive performance activities like gymnastics and dance for kids that reinforces how important these activities are for parents.

While Take a Bow, dancergirl, and the McKenna books don't explicitly offer coping strategies for kids dealing with the constant auditions they must navigate, all the novels highlight the importance of friends in coping with competitive pressure. If one of the reasons why we read fiction is to see, and better understand, our own lives, these books will be welcome reads for children and teens struggling to get a callback every day.

Pint-Sized Phenoms: Sports, Spelling, and Shopping

I was recently quoted in a Chicago Tribune article about parents who brag too much (I promise I will try not to fall into this category myself!). Here's what I had to say: "The quality of the honor your kid is receiving should also enter into your calculations, according to sociologist Hilary Levey Friedman, author of the upcoming book Playing to Win: Raising Children in a Competitive Culture. 'One of the things that's occurred is what I call "the carving up of honor." We have all these awards that are given to kids these days so we (can) say, "My child won! My child's the champion!" But in reality what they won is some very small broken-down category like, they won for roller skating for 4-year-olds who have only been roller skating for three weeks.' Broadcasting these smaller awards can make the parent look silly and put undue pressure on children, Levey Friedman says. 'If it's a real, meaningful accomplishment it's not a bad thing to share that news with other people and for the child to celebrate that with their family members, perhaps with their friends,' she says." When I write this monthly post I try to focus on kids who have achieved in meaningful ways beyond the carving up of honor. Of course, many of them do extraordinary things that get overlooked because they don't play football or basketball, or there is something different about them. In that spirit I present to you this month's honor roll of exceptional kids!

1) Kamron Doyle- Kamron is only in eighth grade, but he can roll with the best of them (pun intended). This 14-year-old phenom is a champion bowler.  A few weeks ago he became the youngest bowler to ever reach the prize-money level in a Professional Bowlers Association tour event. What's amazing is that neither of his parents bowls, but they are supportive of him as he pursues this activity at such a high level. Best of all? All his winnings go straight into his college fund. It's not NBA-levels of cash, but it's a pretty good nest egg for a talented kid!

2) Lola Walters- This 13-year-old gymnast won't be in the running for the 2016 Olympics. But that doesn't make her any less incredible. Lola suffers for nystagmus, which leaves her legally blind. But that doesn't stop her from competing in gymnastics meets, tackling the beam and vault with aplomb. Watch her incredible story below.

3) Braedon Benedict-It's not just athletes who make the list, but also kids who use their brains when it comes to athletics. Case in point? Fifteen-year-old Braedon Benedict who invented a helmet to help warn players and coaches about concussions. The helmet is brilliant in its simplicity: it releases a dye when hit with enough force, visually showing that a player needs to be evaluated. Braedon is working on patenting his invention and he's already won a young scientist event. Let's hope he keeps using his head to come up with more inventions...

4) Lori Anne Madison-  Lori Anne knows how to use her head as well. This six-year-old (yes, six!) is believed to be the youngest ever participant in the National Spelling Bee's 87 year history. Lori Anne is homeschooled, which allows her extra time to study her words. I wonder how long they will let her compete (the cut-off is eighth grade or age 15)? There are actually many, many rules associated with the Bee, which you can check out here; my favorite is, "The speller must not have repeated fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh, or eighth grade for the purpose of extending spelling bee eligibility. If the speller has repeated fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh, or eighth grade, the speller must notify the Scripps National Spelling Bee of the circumstances of grade repetition by March 23, 2011; and the Scripps National Spelling Bee will, in its sole discretion, determine the spellers eligibility status on or before April 30, 2011."

Spelling Bees are experiencing a surge of popularity (besides my pop culture favorites like Spellbound, 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee, Akeelah and the Bee, etc.), helped by coverage on ESPN and network news, according to this Boston Globe article. I've written on the history of Bees, as part of the development of kids' competitive activities, so they will continue to fascinate me I am sure.

5) Willow Tufano-  Also fascinating? Fourteen-year-old Willow Tufano, a Florida resident who is being hailed as a "mini-mogul."  Willow bought a house in her neighborhood for $12,000 (she lives in an area hard but by the real estate bubble) and she now rents it out for $700 per month.  How did she become a landlord? With the help of her real estate mom and some entrepreneurial spirit. She saved up the funds by collecting discarded furniture from foreclosed properties and selling it online.

Who knows, someday Kamron, Lola, Braedon, and Lori Anne could be buying mansions from Willow!

High Kicks: The Latest in Competitive Dance and Soccer from Choreography Theft to Poaching to Year-round Commitments (and Injuries)

Lifetime's Season 2 of Dance Moms continues to get sillier and sillier as the contrivances spin out faster than a terrible fouetté turn.  What can you say when Kendall leaves Abby's studio and ends up at Candy Apples in Ohio besides, "Yeah, right! Producer interference!" in Episode 8, "The Runaway Mom?" And Abby's decision to have the girls compete as burlesque dancers in Episode 9's "Topless Showgirls" is so obviously meant to shock it's painful.  The show, unsurprisingly, made headlines after that tasteless move (even I admit to being mortified when Abby yelled out, "Crotch! Boobs!" in rehearsal).

[Not surprisingly, and somewhat reassuringly, Lifetime is not allowing any rebroadcasts of this episode. Pushed the envelope TOO far (toward pedophilia), clearly. Love the following line from this March 23rd article about the episode being pulled: "Coincidentally, the yanked episode contains a subplot in which a child is transformed into a literal piece of meat."]

But once in the while the show does manage to say something interesting about the state of competitive dance.  Previously they touched on the issue of parents lying about their children's age and age fallbacks. Runaway mom Jill's departure in Episode 8 allowed Abby to discuss a serious issue in dance: choreography theft. Sometimes studios steal choreography from others that they see at competitions, which has long been an issue on the competitive circuit, as I discovered during my research.  But dance isn't just about creativity and artistry-- it is also a business, especially for studio owners like Abby. That choreography is her work product, so when Kendall uses it to "win" for someone else that is a form of intellectual property theft.  (I found this interesting article about what whether or not dance teachers employed by a studio owner own their own choreography after they leave. The issue is similar to one scientists face while working for a university or corporation. The short answer is that, no, they do not own it when they have been paid by someone else to create it.)

The reason why Kendall's defection affected Abby so much though is that it appeared as if Kathy "poached" her-- though this wasn't really what happened.  Another thing I discovered during my research is that poaching (when a coach or organization "steals" a student away from another coach or program) is common in lots of competitive children's activities. But I heard about it most often in travel soccer. In some areas the problem had previously been so bad that leagues had developed rules that once a season started a player was not allowed to switch and play for another team.  Most of the poaching took place in the spring/summer, as team compositions could shift more easily.

Now, with new rules that talented soccer players won't be allowed to play for both a development academy club team (which are at an even higher level than competitive, travel teams) and their high school's team, I expect this to become an even more weighty issue for players. With a year-round season that demands so much commitment it will be interesting to see how American soccer develops and performs over the next decade.  This move seems to be an attempt to unify training procedures-- though we still haven't yet reached true national training programs for young kids, in the grand tradition of many Communist countries.

But this move does signal a hat tip to the ways in which many European soccer ("football") clubs operate. Last week's Times article reminded me of an excellent piece Michael Sokolove wrote in 2010 for The New York Times Magazine: "How A Soccer Star is Made."  Sokolove identified some telling differences in the ways that Americans and Europeans develop child soccer players. He wrote, "Americans like to put together teams, even at the Pee Wee level, that are meant to win...Americans place a higher value on competition than on practice, so the balance between games and practice in the U.S. is skewed when compared with the rest of the world. It’s not unusual for a teenager in the U.S. to play 100 or more games in a season, for two or three different teams, leaving little time for training and little energy for it in the infrequent moments it occurs. A result is that the development of our best players is stunted."  We'll see if this shifts over time.

One likely negative outcome of this highly competitive year-round soccer season is an increase in injuries.  Youth sports injuries continue to garner a lot of attention and concern amongst both medical practitioners and parents. Check out this somewhat disturbing report sponsored by Little League Baseball now saying that they can't say for sure that throwing curveballs hurt young players.

So, what would you chose for your child? Curveballs, year-round seasons, or burlesque dance routines?

High heels beat flats: Why I left (tenure track) academia (Perspective Essay from PAW [Princeton Alumni Weekly])

A very personal essay on why I have opted out of tenure-track academia was just published by my graduate school alma mater's alumni magazine, PAW (Princeton Alumni Weekly).  You can read it in full HERE. It goes without saying that if I was in a tenure-track job at this moment, I wouldn't have this Little Man. So even if I didn't love the writing and speaking as much as I do, life would still be pretty good...

“Hilary, you know you shouldn’t wear high heels.”

No, I didn’t know.

“Believe it or not, we’ve been known to talk about female job candidates’ shoes in faculty meetings. You should go with practical shoes.”

Until that moment, I had thought that my nude Kate Spade pumps were practical. As anyone who has been through any sort of extensive job search knows, you have a go-to power suit. My power suit’s pants had been hemmed so they could be worn perfectly with the aforementioned accompanying power, yet now impractical, pumps.

Stunned, I stammered, “Got it, thanks,” before hanging up with my friend, a recently tenured professor in the sociology department I would be flying out to visit the next day to interview for an assistant ­professorship.

I tossed a pair of flat black boots into my suitcase — and realized that maybe this academic thing wasn’t for me.

Of course, it wasn’t the shoes themselves that sent me over the edge (though they were gorgeous). In a way, this had been a long time coming.

Like most Ph.D. candidates, I had worked hard in school and was good at it. School and learning truly were my “thing” — and my main extracurricular activity. Some kids had basketball, others the flute; I had my books. A lot of my self-identity was wrapped up in this learning “thing.”

In college, while my friends prepared for careers in investment banking, management consulting, and law, I took my GREs and applied for fellowships. I was on the academic track, and not a small part of the allure was that grad school and academia offered a clear path to how my professional life would unfold for the next few decades: a tenure-track position as an assistant professor, then associate and full professor, and finally, an endowed chair.

When I arrived at Princeton in the fall of 2003, I knew what I had to do: Write an outstanding dissertation in sociology, get a stellar job, get tenure. And on the surface I seemed to be excelling — I received some great fellowships, and I had fantastic advisers and female mentors, like Viviana Zelizer, Katherine Newman, and Sara McLanahan.

And yet, something wasn’t quite right.

CLICK HERE TO KEEP READING ON PAW'S WEBSITE!

During my time in Wallace Hall, I began to realize that sociology wasn’t always about engagement with the wider world and people’s everyday lives. Instead, particularly for graduate students, it seemed to be about publishing articles in a narrow range of journals, and those articles often tended to be about arcane topics. (This doesn’t apply to all tenured faculty but, well, they have tenure.)

The things I like to study, however, tend to be the opposite of arcane. I wrote a dissertation on why families with elementary-school-age kids enroll them in competitive after-school activities like chess, dance, and soccer. This was pre-Tiger Mom Amy Chua. I wrote my senior thesis in college on why mothers enroll their young daughters in child beauty pageants. This was pre-Toddlers & Tiaras. I wanted to understand what people care about far from the ivory tower, and what matters in their everyday lives — and how I could help them improve those daily experiences.

But in academia, this openness and desire to write for a broader audience often is seen as suspect. And if your focus is on getting tenure, anything other than “serious” academic publications is a distraction. Six years after starting my Ph.D., I still was more interested in the broad topics and a more mainstream audience. Nonetheless, I continued on the academic path, landing a two-year postdoctoral fellowship.

During those two years, I married a fellow academic, and things became even murkier — and then, suddenly, much clearer. Like many couples in various professions, we were struggling to balance the careers of two ambitious people. In the academic job search, whose job was going to take precedence location-wise? Or, to put it more bluntly, who was going to give?

And the shoes? An analogy, of course, but I realized that I was heading down a path that potentially would stifle the real me — someone who loves pop culture and high heels. And so, I had my epiphany. I no longer wanted to be an academic. I wanted to wear fabulous high-heel shoes all the time, especially after wearing those boring flat, black boots to the interview, having two professors comment on them, and still not getting the job.

Mostly, now, I feel relief. I’m pursuing writing for a more general audience, ­publishing articles in magazines and newspapers and appearing as a “talking head” on local news shows when the subject is childhood and competition. I have a literary agent and am completing a book. I love hearing stories about scientists who left the lab to pursue cooking, or attorneys who left the law for literary pursuits.

The world didn’t end once I no longer received university computing support, lost my “.edu” email address, and stopped adding to the “under review” section of my CV. In fact, the world opened up as I embraced the opportunity to blog and dabble in social media, and I discovered that it felt good when more than a couple of hundred people read my writings. While my formal school days may be over, I’m clearly not done learning. And I do hope that learning can continue to be my “thing” for many decades to come.

Pretty Parenting in the Press: Last week's media appearances

Last week, in between two month vaccines (I may have cried more than he did!) and StrollFit classes to try to lose that baby weight, I was busy talking about a few different strands of my research. 1) I appeared on NECN's The Morning Show to talk about a new, disturbing trend: T(w)een girls posting YouTube videos of themselves (along with pictures, sometimes in various stages of undress) asking if they are pretty or not. Some of the comments are particularly upsetting, if you dare to look (for example, here and here).

I look better 9 weeks postpartum than I did at 9 months, but I still have a long way to go before I look like Beyonce. Then again, I don't have any of the resources (time OR money!) to exercise four hours a day. And, given, the content of this story I don't think it's very healthy for me to stress about this too much-- so long as Carston is healthy and happy! Speaking of the Little Man, he seemed to enjoy seeing me on TV (and, no, don't worry we don't really let him watch television yet...)

If you truly want to be disturbed by another young girl sexualizing herself on YouTube (apparently with the approval and encouragement of her mother), check out this story on 15-year-old "living" doll Venus Palermo, with quotes from yours truly on the matter.

2) Of course it's not just t(w)een girls who worry about their looks. Thanks to child beauty pageants, girls as young as six weeks can start to fuss over their appearances. But one French senator hopes that won't be the case for French girls; Chantal Jouanno has a proposal to ban child beauty pageants in France (among other things). Here's a French article on the subject that quotes me (extra points if you can translate my quotes!). I'll share some other French media, and my thoughts on this legislation later next week.

3) The parenting scandal of 2011, featuring Tiger Mom Amy Chua, continues to have legs. A group of teenage girls from Indianapolis interviewed me for this article that they wrote in The Indianapolis Star (they are part of a very interesting program for aspiring journalists called Y-Press).  If you're interested in more of my thoughts on the Tiger Mom, check out my USA Today column, Contexts article, and book review in The Huffington Post.

4) On a parenting note, I was quoted in an article on how to ask for help with your newborn ("How to get help with your newborn: New mom survival tips." Michelle Maffei. March 11, 2012). I swear, I can't say enough about a truly knowledgeable baby nurse, like Kathy Todd-Seymour's Mother & Child. If you value sleep, and no inter-generational parenting arguments, it's worth it! Plus, it may help you return to work productivity (such as it is, especially if you are nursing) even sooner.

Have a great week, everyone!